Secrets And Lies
Let’s recognize it (at least within us): some more, some less, we all tell lies and have secrets. This is something we should not be proud of, but it is undeniable that it is a habit deeply rooted in human nature.
From a child who plays crying because he wants parental attention to a savvy con man like Bernard Madoff, at all ages and to a greater or lesser extent, lying is part of our lives. But where does this urge to deceive or hide the truth come from?
A network of deceptions
According to some scientific studies, two strangers lie to each other roughly 300 times during the first ten minutes of their conversation. This figure, although it may seem impressive to us, is not so surprising if we think that lies are nothing more than a bridge between our fantasies, that is, what we want to be and what we really are. By inventing some details about ourselves, we feel we are filling a void due to qualities that we think we do not have and that would make us feel more appreciated.
Scholars also claim that we tell between one hundred and two hundred lies a day … Incredible isn’t it? Will there be anyone truly capable of recognizing it? If we then consider that we are surrounded by lies such as spam, fake digital friends, identity thieves and cheaters of all kinds, the panorama is certainly not attractive. All this creates a hostile environment, from which we must protect ourselves to avoid being victims of these “professional liars”, these impostors, but at the same time we participate in it in some way.
Lies with a lowercase “b”
Not all lies are destructive. There are also those called “white lies”, whereby we protect another person, to avoid hurting their feelings or causing negative consequences. For example, if we receive a gift that we don’t like, we pretend the opposite so as not to make the person who made this generous gesture with us feel bad.
Another touching example of a white lie is given in the film “Life is Beautiful”: in the midst of the Nazi Holocaust, a father makes his son believe that all the people in the concentration camp are actually playing a fun game, and all of this. just to protect him from suffering. Secrets can also be kept in order not to ruin a person’s reputation or to avoid divulging information that could be painful, such as the case of a mother who spares her children the details of the couple’s quarrels and arguments, for them to notice. , they would be afflicted.
However, there are secrets that, although it may be painful to know, must be confessed because the person sooner or later will discover them or because they simply have the right to know. This is the case with adopted children or with serious illnesses that a person can suffer from. In these circumstances, it is important to prepare the person and be very tactful in disclosing the information, so as not to cause a greater impact than it should.
If we are not careful, the lies create a tangle in which we ourselves become entangled. They possess a destructive power capable of seriously ruining relationships and causing complications in other people’s lives. And although in real life white lies are necessary, sometimes, living in a world of lies to prove what we are not or to manipulate others has a boomerang effect in the long run, because … There is nothing hidden that will not be unveiled.
Image courtesy of (cup) cake_eater
