7 Steps To Know Yourself Better

Knowing yourself is, perhaps, the most difficult and also one of the most important tasks that we must undertake. Some signs show us whether we have succeeded to some extent or not. We can say that no one succeeds completely, as the process is highly subjective. We are both the subject that knows as the object to know. This makes it difficult to do so.

Accepting and valuing oneself is one of the signs of self-knowledge. Only those who accept and value themselves can live satisfactorily. For this reason, self-knowledge is so important, since the way we act and the goals we achieve largely depends on it.

What makes the process of self-knowledge difficult are education and the context in which one grows up. Each person is interpreted by those around him, from the exact moment he is born and in an inevitable way. In other words, others attach meaning to who we are and what we do since we start living.

This interpretation is not always, or rather almost never, correct. It has more to do with the performers than with ourselves. The process of knowledge, therefore, begins with detaching oneself from these ideas.

How to know if we know each other or not? We will immediately list some signs that indicate this.

Seek your own truth in external factors

One of the signs that we do not know each other is a tendency to seek answers, reasons or reasons in some external factor. We don’t believe there is wisdom in us. We underestimate what is in our soul and, therefore, we only give validity to what is outside of us.

Perhaps we often don’t realize that, as far as our feelings, emotions and life are concerned, there are no possible answers outside of us. And if there are, they are always partial and possibly erroneous. Nothing and no one has the right to tell us what to do or how we should feel. The answer to all this is always found within us.

Compare yourself to others

Comparing oneself to others is a wrong way of answering questions about ‘who we are’ and ‘what we are capable of doing’. It is not true that if the guy could, then we can too or vice versa. If everyone goes in a certain direction, for example, it does not necessarily mean that this is the correct path.

Comparing oneself to others, one falls into a trap. Does it seem reasonable to you to compare yellow with blue? Is it valid to make a comparison between water and land? Confrontation, especially when it is obsessive, only causes frustration or false self-love.

Repent of saying “yes” or “no”

It is one of the typical signs of a lack of self-knowledge. There is a certain amount of doubt in the face of all the decisions that need to be made. It doesn’t matter if it concerns big or small aspects, you always doubt and many times you end up opting for something you didn’t really want.

We say “yes” or “no” because we feel that a situation or a person is putting pressure on us. We do not consult with our heart or mind or experience before committing ourselves to the answer given and we end up regretting it.

Seek the approval of power figures

Power figures exert a great fascination on those who do not know themselves. It is an unequivocal sign. In reality, the quality of these power figures is not evaluated, but they are attributed importance and their approval is sought regardless of the values ​​they represent.

Approval by a power figure compensates for the feeling of uncertainty caused by lack of self-knowledge. It is a way of replacing the bond with one’s ego with an external agent with sufficient strength to dilute personal insecurities.

Give great importance to criticism or teasing

Since we have not developed a personal criterion for evaluating our actions, excessive value is placed on the opinions of others. If this opinion is positive, there is serenity. If, on the other hand, it is censorship or reproach, the world collapses.

Depending on the opinion of others is a sure way to gradually deform the image one has of oneself. We all certainly want others to accept us and have a positive opinion about us. This, however, cannot be achieved at the cost of sacrificing one’s identity, otherwise it turns into slavery.

If you make a mistake, you want to die

When we don’t know ourselves, we judge ourselves with great severity. To know is to understand and when it is understood, the judgments are relativized. Not only are the results observed, but also the processes, causes and consequences.

Understanding elicits more benevolent reasoning. If we make a mistake, we can forgive ourselves more easily, because we understand that it is part of a life lesson. If we don’t know each other, we face error as a threat; we are afraid of annihilating and disappearing.

React impulsively in the face of conflict

Those who know themselves do not feel attracted to conflict. He knows that his emotional energies are limited and that he cannot allow himself the luxury of wasting them on useless exercises. The opposite happens to those who do not know themselves: they seek conflict as a means of reasserting themselves. However, he never seeks major conflicts, but rather trifles.

One of the signs that indicate a good degree of self-knowledge is self-control. Those who know each other know how to manage emotions and rarely let themselves be carried away by the immediate impulse. Otherwise, the person snaps like a spring even in the face of trivial situations, because he feels that almost everything puts him at risk.

Self-knowledge is a life-long task, but any effort in this regard is worthwhile. And it is because it allows for a greater degree of awareness, independence, freedom and security. Don’t deny yourself the opportunity to navigate the puzzles and wonders of the most important person: yourself.